LOVE...

love is pain..it is beautiful and equals ugliness. People put on their best faces for love..they disceive for love they are devious for love. They please for love and say please to love. Love is blind and it'll take over your mind drive u crazy make you call someone baby..boy you stay on my mind no matter how unkind you are like a magical sailboat driver a boy driving a remote control car imagining himself inside driving it and i imagine i am inside it too sitting right next to you. You are the boy and I am the red balloon...i wait for you to come soon so I can come too. but i wait on a moment in the velvet sea and that moment never comes the moment ends though I feel winds on my face and through my hair you still aren't there but in your mind you are i feel so far baby you can't drive my car..yes i'm gonna be a star somewhere else anywhere but where you are if I'm ever going to forget, but do i want to? why do i need to forget to stop loving you when i know that's impossible improbable for me to do? am i doing the wrong thing? it ain't all wrong but it ain't all right...i know that there is dichotomy in every part of life great and small..what then is all this about? i think it's b/c i need to find time for me..without you on my brain..i need to be just me..no thoughts of another person except me. for some reason, i may not know why now...we are meant to be apart for the time being. at least that's what i lead myself to believe. or am i just wasting more time...is it all a waste? shouldn't i just waste my time with you and turn the page in view.. is it our book or mine and i have to turn the page that leaves you in chapter 2? where are you? where is your mind..i know mine's with your mind and your mind's on my sunshine like you say... you can't get me out of your head, well has it always been bended that way in that direction or is it b/c now it seems to go that you don't know what you got till its gone i don't think we are going to forget that what we got is not a lot b/c we don't have each other when we coulda had it all, made other peoples relationships seem small compared to the great wall of our love built in this small town reaching as far as the mountains and trees right behind loomis street brushing our teeth and riding bikes i was supposed to be writing about love in general love as an entity but it turned into you...b/c you are/were the love in my life but now i feel as though i have to give up on that love..but isn't that exactly what love is not supposed to do? love never ceases..it never gives up..it holds on and continues unconditionally....i could probably write on this topic forever and ever..continue to write something more about it everyday and never ever figure it out for sure. it is a mystery..his and her-story...not really one of much glory actually rather gooey and gorey...he is crazy and makes me insanery...love is the one thing that we all strive for...it is the thing that everyone wants to have. we all have love..but is this thing called true love..the greatest love of all it is a combination of romantic love, friendship, unconditional love and desire in every sense of the word..on a physical, emotional, mental, humorful, fun, personality personalized level...i think that love is like an addiction...it's been compared to a drug...b/c once you get it, you never want to give it up..b/c its so good...you love it that much...its like when i loved blazing...i thought, how am i ever going to give this up.. i love it too much..i'm never going to be able to stop..its when it started to bug me out and not make me feel good about myself that i gave up on it. but love is something you never want to give up on..you sometimes try to ..but you cant..it keeps finding a way back into your life...and you secretly want it to. sharlene said it was like a cigarette....the beginning is so sweet...and the middle..you get used to it, but its still good..and then at the end..you know its approaching that end..and you hate to see it go...but then it eventually has to die and its the butt. i think of love as an addiction. you know its bad for you, but its so good. you cant stop it..it's out of your control..you just have to let it take its course and find the power within yourself to ..i don't even know


I wrote this a few months ago.